The Armchair Quarterback Volume 75: Offseason Priorities for the 49ers

Image Credit: Andrew Giesemann

The San Francisco 49ers as an organization likely breathed a sigh of relief once the 2020 season ended. There were more injuries than one could imagine in a single season, players put on the reserve/COVID-19 list, and the team got evicted from their facilities and stadium in Santa Clara, California due to implications from the pandemic.

It was not a fun season for the team by any stretch of the imagination. But now all that is over, and the team must focus on their offseason priorities. Things like re-signing offensive tackle Trent Williams who came to the team via trade and getting a new contract for newly anointed All-Pro linebacker Fred Warner are top priorities in terms of football operations.


What though, are some non-football priorities that the 49ers must take care of this offseason?

COVID-19 Vaccine or Rabies Vaccine?


The other day rookie defensive tackle Javon Kinlaw posted a video on his Instagram story that showed him with a squirrel in his mouth. The squirrel was dead. But the question remains. Why?


Kinlaw is from South Carolina and he may have been showcasing some of his Southern sensibilities. Even if he was returning from a squirrel hunt, and was carrying his winnings from the hunt -- why the mouth?


That just seems dangerous. Can squirrels give you rabies? Does Kinlaw need a rabies vaccination in addition to his COVID-19 vaccination? These are all questions that we need answered.


Whatever the case it may be, a priority going into this season would be to add some kind of team rule that prohibits holding dead animals in one’s mouth and posting it to a social media account. That is of course unless that animal has been prepped and cooked already.

Can You Take Me Higher?


In the Week 4 game the 49ers played against the Philadelphia Eagles, rookie wide receiver Brandon Aiyuk had a highly impressive swan leap over an Eagles defender in which he landed gracefully in the endzone for a score. Aiyuk went on to have an excellent rookie season in which he made the PFF All-Rookie team.


The Faithful need more of that leaping ability in year two. This offseason the 49ers should make it a priority to put hurdles all over the team facility, along the paths that Aiyuk walks. He should be encouraged to leap over those hurdles as he walks from the parking lot to the locker room, from the locker room to the field, and from the field back to the locker room. That is a lot of leaping, but the sky is the limit (no pun intended) for the young receiver.

The Perfect “Shanahat”


The hats that head coach Kyle Shanahan wears on game days are constantly discussed amongst the Faithful. The most popular “Shanahat,” as they are called, was the one in red with a black logo. Shanahan was seen sporting it a number of times in the 2019 season and it was thought to have brought good luck to the team.


In 2020 he added a variety of head gear to his arsenal. A gray hat adorned his head in many games during the 2020 season. And we all know how that went.


Therefore, it is a must, that the 49ers and Shanahan find the luckiest “Shanahat” for him to wear during the 2021 season. It needs to be blessed by every holy person that the team can get access to. Whatever needs to be done to that hat before he wears it must be done. The fate of the franchise depends on it.

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