The Armchair Quarterback Volume 52: Hot and Cold Takes Early Offseason Edition
Image Credit: Andrew Giesemann
Well, here we are in that slow time of the year before NFL free agency begins and before the NFL draft. And when it’s slow, the media starts to perpetuate rumors that are based in speculation rather than truth. There is one particularly overblown rumor that is starting to really sink into San Francisco 49ers circles. It started with some whisperings and went full blown in media rooms and with Twitter posts. And when things like that start to happen, it’s only right that we bring you another edition of Red and Cold Takes.
Cold Take Number One: The 49ers will go after Tom Brady in 2020
If you know John Lynch, then you already know one thing
He doesn’t go chasing dreams based in nothing
Tom Brady will be 43 by the start of the season
Mortgaging your future to sign him would be treason
The 49ers already have a QB on their roster
Ones whose future they should absolutely foster
I’m talking about Jimmy G who’s 21-5 as a starter
You can’t underestimate that record partner
So instead of talking Brady to the Bay and all the feels
Let’s talk about Kittle and Buckner getting their deals
Cold Take Number Two: The 49ers will go after Tom Brady in 2020 (not a typo)
Deion Sanders was supposed to be talking combine
But Brady to the Bay was the only thing on his mind
Brady to SF and Garoppolo back to New England
Is this Stranger Things, are the we in the upside-down land?
All these rumors might be dandy and fun
But there are more important moves to get done
Media please stop talking about the 49ers acquiring Brady
The 49ers already have a QB and he, “Feels Great Baby!”
Cold Take Number Three: The 49ers will go after Tom Brady in 2020 (still not a typo)
The cons of making this move outweigh the pros
Why can’t these pundits see what’s right under their nose?
The win right now trick always comes back to bite you
Don’t believe me ask Sean McVay what he went through
All that sign and trade talk is starting to sound shady
Last year it revolved around Brown this year it’s Brady
So please media and Brady acolytes just know this move won’t click
The 49ers are ready to build with what they have brick by brick
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