The Armchair Quarterback Volume 38: Red and Cold Takes Turns 4-0

October 11, 2019

   Image Credit: Andrew Giesemann

“Four-and-oh,” a sultry and seductive sound that was last heard in 1990 for the San Francisco 49ers franchise! But with the good comes the not-so-good. Critics come out of the woodwork and try to downplay the 49ers’ success. They comment on the lack of quality opponents that the team has faced. They find random statistical holes in their game. And the real deplorables insult head coach Kyle Shanahan’s offense! Because of all that, today we bring you another edition of Red and Cold Takes, the segment where we respond to all the wacky criticisms of the team for your reading pleasure! This week’s method of response: the quatrain!

 

 

“Sean McVay is a Better Head Coach Than Kyle Shanahan”

 

Please stop comparing McVay to Shanahan

McVay had better players to begin his career

Lynch and Shanny had a 3-year plan

And on Sunday we’ll see which fans have the louder cheer

 

 

“Jimmy Garoppolo is Not Good”

 

When your team averages 200 yards on the ground per game

You don’t have to sling the ball 400 yards each time out

You make smart throws and pick up first downs all the same

And keep defeating all your opponents in a rout  

 

 

“Mike McGlinchey is a Bust Because He Got Injured” 

 

He injured his knee yet stayed in the game Monday night

And helped his team pick up 275 yards on the ground

He never quits, and doesn’t go down without a fight

And in four to six weeks he’ll be back for the next round

 

 

 

Now let’s recap. The McVay-Shanahan comparisons were not apples to apples. McVay had much more talent on his team when he arrived in 2017. Shanahan and general manager John Lynch built the team from the ground up with very few holdovers from the previous regimes. Now finally on Sunday they will have teams that are relatively equal in talent. This game will be a true test for both teams. 

 

Quarterback Jimmy Garoppolo hasn’t had to ball out yet, because he has an AMAZING backfield! They are averaging a league-high 200 yards rushing per game. But best believe if the running game is not working out, he has the ability to make big throws and put up numbers. And finally, right tackle Mike McGlinchey is one of the top offensive linemen in the league. His absence will be felt on Sunday, though Shanahan will surely have some tricks up his sleeve to counter that loss. 

 

So, onto Los Angeles to beat those Rams!

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