• Safa Shooshtry

The Armchair Quarterback Volume 3: The Coronation of King George

Image Credit: Stan Szeto/USA Today Sports

The war historians all looked on in amazement as they commented “he glides gracefully across the battlefield as though he were still a youthful lad of 13 stone”. But no longer a lad of a mere 13 stone at the Hawkeye War Academy was George. Now an impressive warrior at a staggering 18 stone he had become!

On the ninth day of December, in the year of our Lord two-thousand and eighteen, a young warrior, George of House Kittle, first of his name, mover of chains, breaker of records, was crowned king on the battlefield of Levi. Flanked tight at the end of the 49th Regiment’s battle formation, he led an attack that encompassed 210 yards. He laid waste to all Horsemen from the Kingdom of Denver that stood in his path and brought glory to the Kingdom of Saint Francis!

After an impressive first half of battle, full of offensive attacks from the 49th Regiment, they decided to conserve strength and fall back. But Commander Joseph of the Kingdom of Denver did not go away without a fight, ordering his soldiers to continue attacking. His star solider Phillip of Clan Lindsay continued to rush the 49th Regiment, but to no avail. He was thwarted throughout the day especially by the 49th Regiment’s young knight, Marcell of Clan Harris who defended the land well. After their effort proved to be futile, the Horsemen had to accept defeat, and were forced to retreat back to their wintry lands.

In a year in which the Kingdom of Saint Francis had suffered defeat in many painfully close battles, a campaign such as this against a formidable opponent was much needed to lift the spirits of the 49th Regiment and their country-folk alike. Young Nicholas of House Mullens demonstrated that he is in fact a capable stand-in as Hand of the King, while James of House Garoppolo recovers from battle inflicted injuries that have caused him to step down temporarily from that post.

As the 49th Regiment rests up from their latest battle, they know that in the distance an army of Warbirds from the Emerald Kingdom march forth. Seeing as the 49th Regiment suffered a substantial defeat already to those Warbirds, it is up to Commander Shanahan to reform his strategy to neutralize those Warbirds and send them home in defeat this time around. King George is an even greater asset this time around as he is more battle tested and wiser, look for him to be a key figure in this upcoming battle.

By decree of the old Gods and the new, George of House Kittle, first of his name, mover of chains, breaker of records will henceforth be known as King George of the Kingdom of Saint Francis. LONG LIVE THE KING!

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